I. Memories & Lessons

15:34 “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”
What happens to consciousness when dying?
Can we see through the veil of time?
My obsession with number Four.
Symbols? Patterns? Unusual connections.
Am I wired wrong?
An owl sings in the dark of night. For some traditions it is a bad omen,
but it captivates me; my father used to draw little owls.
“I like lotions that smell blue.”
“Keep your shoes clean.”
“I did this little experiment with colors.”
“I’ll make a painting over this canvas: minimalism, and geometrical figures.”
"My favorite dreams are when I can fly ... I run and jump into the sky ..."
“Look: the cracks in the floor are breaths from the house,
small leaks that release the accumulated pressure.”
“You know, it’s always worth it… doing good.”


II. Holy Days

Thursday:
We share a whiskey.
Talk holidays:
"Wouldn't you like to have more days for yourself?"
"I wouldn’t know what to do with so much free time…”

Friday:
It’s pouring.
Mother:
“Have you noticed that on holy Friday it always rains? I get goosebumps."
3 o clock.
Rain is the tears of Christ.
Guitar. Record. Incorporate the background noise.

Saturday:
The Seventh Seal:
“Today I met death. We are playing chess. ”
Wallpaper image.

Sunday:
A strong howling wind in the morning.
The Flying Fish: its first image in color, flying free over the galaxy.
Are three days enough to resurrect?


III. The Tallest Wave Ever

To be strong does not necessarily means to avoid asking for help:
There’s no need to carry the world on your shoulders.
The disease advances. Wrong moves. Testing 1, 2, 3.
I’m unable to cheer him up. No words.
Then comes Night.
Fear. Emergency. Decisions. Truth Reveals. No Insurance. Concern.
New wallpaper.
Ambulance. Transfer.
“When you get better we’ll take a trip to Mars” she says, he laughs.
Arrival to The Sixth Dimension.
Bad feeling. A favor.
“I’ll do the paperwork”. My last words to him.
Total Isolation. No cellphone.
Lost on the way back home.
Night hallucinations.
The Crowned One presents itself to me.
Cold shivering and a sense of impending doom.
No breath. No sleep.
“I’m sorry we have no information. I’m sorry we have no information.”
I’m tired, falling asleep, sweating, and waiting in the car.
1:30 pm good news 7:30 pm not so good news.
We wait… eat, talk and sleep better.
Everything will be ok. He’ll be fine...
He'll be fine... Right?


IV. Verdict, Anger & Mourning

The Day
April 22, 2020 04/22/2020 4 / 4 / 4
My obsession with number Four.
Wednesday = Mercury = Hermes = Thoth
I thought he would be ok.
As I wandered through oneiric fantasies, basketball, monkeys and space jams…
…an interruption.
RING RING RING !!
7:30 am : The Call. Bad news:
“He stopped breathing. Resuscitation. Then a second time… Come urgently.”
BUT IS HE OK??
Call mom. Drive. "NO". Arriving. On our way.
Parking $200.00 you give me the change later.
Run.
They’re crying.
He is gone…
Alone. Strangers. Isolated.
I cry. I shout in ANGER! She’s on her knees, sister yells.
We can’t believe it. It’s all a nightmare.
His face.
Goodbye. Sealed bag. Ashes.
Private ceremony. Four of us. I sing. We weep.


V. Retrospective, A New Life & The Metaphysics

He was always a reserved man, hermetic:
Hermes lips are tightly sealed.
He never shared with us he was in pain, hermetic:
Hermes lips are tightly sealed.
He was isolated, alone, hermetic:
Hermes lips are tightly sealed.
His results were “inconclusive”, hermetic:
Hermes lips are tightly sealed.
He was sealed in a bag, no way to open it, completely hermetic:
Hermes lips are tightly sealed.

22/04/2020
Earth’s Day & Celebration of Ishtar
Venus had been very bright the past days.

Then 3 days later: The floor erupts.
“Look: the cracks in the floor are breaths from the house,
small leaks that release the accumulated pressure.”
Pressure has now been finally released.
Eternal Life awaits.
We’ll evolve, live on.
I'll finish your painting.
You can rest.
Thank you.
Forever.